A Eulogy For Mom
There’s a funny stereotype about how nobody wants to turn into their parents, and boy did my mom NOT want to become her mom!
That said, anytime someone tells me that I’m just like my mom, I smile and nod because I’m proud to be her daughter, proud to be so much like her, Proud to exude so many of her good qualities.
When I was little she used to ask me “how’d you get to be so pretty?” Or “how’d you get to be so smart?” And I’d smile and say “I get it from my mama!”
She was more than my mom, she was my role model, and my best friend.
For those who knew her, you’ll remember her zeal for life, her sense of adventure, her creativity, and if you’re lucky, her sweet, warm hugs. If you were close with her, you’ll also remember her long stories, her loud laugh, and her delicious home cookin’! For those who may not have known her, you’d recognize her by her fruit.
Jesus said a good tree produces good fruit, and my mama was good. The fruit of the spirit was so evident in her life.
She loved others big! She was filled with joy, even in her darkest moments. She carried with her a presence of peace wherever she went. She was surprisingly patient, even in moments when I would have totally lost my cool. She was the kindest woman I’ve ever known. She was gentle and delicate when necessary. She was incredibly faithful— in all relationships, but especially her 21 years of marriage and ministry. And she taught me so much about self-control (although admittedly, in recent years, she was definitely a bit more more “spicy” than ever before, and she was not afraid to tell you what she was thinking lol)
She also demonstrated a beautiful example of a servant heart, and set a standard for hospitality that I aspire to daily, and may never reach.
The way she perfectly timed every dish of the meal to come out of the oven, hot and ready, at the exact moment when the guests arrived… I may never know how she did that!
She found purpose and joy in serving others—at the church, the camp, and any party, event, or function she ever attended.
I used to tease her that she couldn’t sit still long enough to enjoy the party, but I knew it was actually a desire to watch and experience the other guests enjoying their experience.
She was what one might call, the adventurous type. She was always planning a trip—cruises and travel and adventures. She loved ride Harley’s and hot rods with her man, and she loved to go on trips with her ladies. If you had to fly, drive, cruise, or take a train to get there, she wanted to visit!
Another fun fact about mom: She was NOT into traditional fitness or working out, and in her younger years she never needed it. But as age did what age does, she sought out ways to move her body that she thought were FUN instead of work.
She was a self taught Zumba instructor, and the designated Camp Holy Wild Aqua Aerobics instructor, along with leader of her many other ideas for fun fitness. The more recent, and hilarious one was bungee fitness, from the comfort of her living room. Thanks to the perfect support beam on display in our post-hurricane home.
My mom held space for me, and those she cared about, like no one else. She was the one person I could tell my deepest darkest secrets to, and she would listen wholly and completely, without judgement. Even when she disagreed with me, she gave me space to form my own thoughts and make my own decisions.
Well, most of the time. She also had a way of framing an idea and presenting it to you such a way that you thought it was your own.
Like when we got matching tattoos. She really tried to talk me out of it at first, but my pitch about sentimental value won her over. She winced at the pain, but she grinned and beared it. Later saying “the things we do for our kids!” Her handwriting will forever remind me that I am, in fact, her sunshine.
Especially in more recent years, her strength and perseverance never ceased to amaze me. Her fight with cancer was hard on us all, but her ability to overcome changed our outlook on life.
The way she overcame that earthly the experience, and used it for God’s glory, inspires me even still. She used her experience to minister to others, to love and support them, and to encourage and inspire them to overcome any obstacles of their own.
My mom was incredibly generous— the kind of person who would give you the shirt off her back. I can’t begin to count the times she’s gifted us with things or took us shopping “just because”.
Whether it was a handcrafted little something, or a playful “hey mom, I like this, can I have it”, “of course baby”. she always made sure we had anything we wanted or needed.
Her final gift, the day she passed, was the gift of focus and light. Apparently she was an organ donor (I told you she was generous), but due to her battle with cancer, she was unable to donate anything, other than her corneas.
I had heard of the cornea, but didn’t really understand its function, so I looked it up. Your corneas are essential for light refraction and the ability to focus your eyesight. I think it’s beautiful that someone out there has a little piece of mom with them, and she is helping them with their ability to receive light.
My mother was the standard for beauty in my eyes, and she taught me how to be a Godly woman. She was the best human example I could live with and be raised by, and I am the woman I am today, in large part because of her.
I’m finding peace in this inexpressible pain because I know that I know that I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that my beautiful Mama is jumping and dancing with praise at this very moment.
She finally has the privilege of spending her eternal life in the presence of her Heavenly Father. She is in the perfect place, in perfect health, and experiencing perfect peace, forever.